Homework. Tests. Research. Small Group. PLTL. Tutoring. Treasury. Even IM sports. My life has become deluged with an overwhelming flood of things to do, and not enough time to do it all.
I pull out a blue, folded slip of card stock. I hold the card stock in front of me, and the never-ending stream of work and activities crashes into an impenetrable wall, despite its seemingly porous nature. For three days the card stock will hold the river back, and I will be left standing on firm, dry ground with 49 friends. For those three days, we will not have to worry about the river, and our attention will be solely on He who parts seas and moves mountains.
During these three days, I hope that each of us finds a rock in the middle of the river that we will carry with us so that we will remember when the flood of college life was stopped by a little piece of card stock sent from God; a piece of card stock on which every one of our names was written with the hope that one day our names will be found written in the Book of Life.
And after those three days, we shall cross the river into the Promised Land, where many battles await us. But we will fight without fear, for during those three days will we be equipped with armor of God. No river, no sword, no essay or exam can stop us from claiming our inheritance in the Kingdom of Heaven as children of God through Jesus Christ.
God does not call the equipped. He equips the called.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Raaa-raaa-ra-a-a-ahhh!
Recently I heard "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga on the radio. It was actually kind of nice hearing it, considering how ridiculously overplayed it once was. There are several different ways I look at the song.
The perspective that's probably easier to consider is wanting to be more than "just friends" with someone of the opposite gender. I would imagine that it's really common among people who are shy or nervous about expressing their romantic feelings. And of course, there's waiting for the day when your feelings are finally reciprocated. Maybe that person had feelings for you all along and was in the same boat you were in. Maybe that person was not interested in you in that way at first or were already in a relationship ("You Belong With Me" or "Teardrops on My Guitar" anyone?), but then later realized how much you love him/her and all that you've done for your friend.
As dreamy and rosy-colored as that relationship might be, I'm actually glad that Lada Gaga also mentions some of the negative or challenging aspects of relationships, namely facing your beloved's horrors, diseases, and psycho tendencies. Loving someone means loving the whole person, not just the good aspects of that person. There will be drama and maybe even horror in a relationship. If you really want to love someone, you will have to bear with that person's bad habits, anger, fears, insecurities, flaws, ugliness, past emotional baggage, traumatic or painful experiences, whatever. None of us are perfect, but we all want to be loved.
And now comes my criticism of the conceptions of love presented in the song. Love is not an uncontrollable obsession (better exemplified in Ke$ha's "Your Love is My Drug"). Love is a choice to commit to someone. A person should not go into a relationship to satiate their lust (no need to mention all of the sexual innuendos in the song), experience the thrills and drama of a relationship, or satisfy the need to feel and be loved. Doing so is just asking for heartache, heartbreak, and revenge (although I guess that's what Lady Gaga wants). Love is not about me; it's about you.
I've seen and heard about (well, more so heard about) so many broken hearts and torn relationships. I just want people to save themselves needless pain and wasted time, energy, and money. Please, save your love for a person who is truly worth the devotion and sacrifice, and always ask yourself why you want to be with someone before you jump into something that you didn't quite ask for.
Also there are times (or more like most of the time) where friendship is more beneficial and rewarding than romance with someone of the opposite gender you care about. I'm no expert in that area, so I'll leave advice on that matter to others or future me.
Finally, I want to say that no romantic relationship will completely satisfy you. The only thing that can is God and His love for us. For thousands of years, God has been setting the prime example of what it means to love someone and showing us how bad we are at loving Him, let alone other people. Only when we love God can we truly begin to love other people as we all want to be loved and are meant to be loved; a love that is selfless, unconditional, and unending.
Raaa-raaa-ra-a-a-ahhh! Don't want your bad rooo-mance!
The perspective that's probably easier to consider is wanting to be more than "just friends" with someone of the opposite gender. I would imagine that it's really common among people who are shy or nervous about expressing their romantic feelings. And of course, there's waiting for the day when your feelings are finally reciprocated. Maybe that person had feelings for you all along and was in the same boat you were in. Maybe that person was not interested in you in that way at first or were already in a relationship ("You Belong With Me" or "Teardrops on My Guitar" anyone?), but then later realized how much you love him/her and all that you've done for your friend.
As dreamy and rosy-colored as that relationship might be, I'm actually glad that Lada Gaga also mentions some of the negative or challenging aspects of relationships, namely facing your beloved's horrors, diseases, and psycho tendencies. Loving someone means loving the whole person, not just the good aspects of that person. There will be drama and maybe even horror in a relationship. If you really want to love someone, you will have to bear with that person's bad habits, anger, fears, insecurities, flaws, ugliness, past emotional baggage, traumatic or painful experiences, whatever. None of us are perfect, but we all want to be loved.
And now comes my criticism of the conceptions of love presented in the song. Love is not an uncontrollable obsession (better exemplified in Ke$ha's "Your Love is My Drug"). Love is a choice to commit to someone. A person should not go into a relationship to satiate their lust (no need to mention all of the sexual innuendos in the song), experience the thrills and drama of a relationship, or satisfy the need to feel and be loved. Doing so is just asking for heartache, heartbreak, and revenge (although I guess that's what Lady Gaga wants). Love is not about me; it's about you.
I've seen and heard about (well, more so heard about) so many broken hearts and torn relationships. I just want people to save themselves needless pain and wasted time, energy, and money. Please, save your love for a person who is truly worth the devotion and sacrifice, and always ask yourself why you want to be with someone before you jump into something that you didn't quite ask for.
Also there are times (or more like most of the time) where friendship is more beneficial and rewarding than romance with someone of the opposite gender you care about. I'm no expert in that area, so I'll leave advice on that matter to others or future me.
Finally, I want to say that no romantic relationship will completely satisfy you. The only thing that can is God and His love for us. For thousands of years, God has been setting the prime example of what it means to love someone and showing us how bad we are at loving Him, let alone other people. Only when we love God can we truly begin to love other people as we all want to be loved and are meant to be loved; a love that is selfless, unconditional, and unending.
Raaa-raaa-ra-a-a-ahhh! Don't want your bad rooo-mance!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
Why am I I?
I hate being introverted. I wish I could just get boundless energy from meeting, seeing, talking, and interacting with people. It would make it so much easier to show that I care about people and to make people feel like someone cares about them. Plus knowing a lot of people has its practical benefits as well (a.k.a. networking). Instead I usually become either drained or bored by large groups of people (if I'm not intimidated by the sheer number of people in the first place), and sooner or later I just want to leave. I see a value in introspection, but none in introversion.
I'm also fairly sure that I'm a bad, or at best mediocre, PLTL leader. I lack assertiveness and authority, am not comfortable thinking on my feet or making decisions quickly, have a tendency to stutter or mumble, and sometimes give them advice that causes my group to overthink things or get the wrong answer to a problem. I think it's good that I've unwittingly gone out of my comfort zone and tried to be a leader. I've learned a lot about myself and how to lead a small group and been forced to be more comfortable and confident about telling people what to do and speaking in a group or public setting. I still lack a lot of confidence though. Still, I normally don't like ordering people around, and I feel like I am not good at getting people to talk. I don't think my need of time to think and process things before I speak helps the flow of a discussion either. How the heck am I supposed to run a small group of Asians if I don't even lead a PLTL well (where most people are white)?
Oh, did I mention people in general intimidate me?
Sometimes, I just don't like being me.
I'm also fairly sure that I'm a bad, or at best mediocre, PLTL leader. I lack assertiveness and authority, am not comfortable thinking on my feet or making decisions quickly, have a tendency to stutter or mumble, and sometimes give them advice that causes my group to overthink things or get the wrong answer to a problem. I think it's good that I've unwittingly gone out of my comfort zone and tried to be a leader. I've learned a lot about myself and how to lead a small group and been forced to be more comfortable and confident about telling people what to do and speaking in a group or public setting. I still lack a lot of confidence though. Still, I normally don't like ordering people around, and I feel like I am not good at getting people to talk. I don't think my need of time to think and process things before I speak helps the flow of a discussion either. How the heck am I supposed to run a small group of Asians if I don't even lead a PLTL well (where most people are white)?
Oh, did I mention people in general intimidate me?
Sometimes, I just don't like being me.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Help!
I need somebody
Help!
Not just anybody
Help!
You know I need someone
Help!
God, I am really going to need your help this year. I am 99.99% sure that if I try to do everything I plan to do this year on my own strength and wisdom, or more like my own weakness and folly, I will fail, perhaps even collapse. Please give me to strength to do what you want me to do, to advance your kingdom, proclaim your glory, and prepare myself and those around me to do great things in Your name.
I think I'm already starting to go crazy. I'm scared. I hope I make it through this year with my body, mind, and spirit in one piece.
It's all for you God.
Help!
Not just anybody
Help!
You know I need someone
Help!
God, I am really going to need your help this year. I am 99.99% sure that if I try to do everything I plan to do this year on my own strength and wisdom, or more like my own weakness and folly, I will fail, perhaps even collapse. Please give me to strength to do what you want me to do, to advance your kingdom, proclaim your glory, and prepare myself and those around me to do great things in Your name.
I think I'm already starting to go crazy. I'm scared. I hope I make it through this year with my body, mind, and spirit in one piece.
It's all for you God.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)